In a Pickle

There's always a little bit of a risk when going on a blind date. I believe in being one's self in any given situation. I've learned, however, that it might be wise to be one's best self to start with and then as you get to know each other better, you can start to show more and more. Some things about a person can be a little much when a relationship is very young.

It's great, though, when some of those things come out and it creates some common ground. Not necessarily that you both find you like the exact same things, but maybe that you look at the world in a similar way.

Take a recent blind date experience of mine, for example. I decided several years ago that it makes for a more interesting date if I bring out the more talkative, bubbly side of me on a blind date as opposed to the more shy, stand-offish side - go figure. What happens when that side of me comes out can be fun, but I can also spew out some things that might fall into the "save it for later" category. This happens especially when comversation between us comes easily. It can turn into somewhat of a stream of consciousness conversation.

So, we were having a picnic he put together at a popular local historical site. He prepared a nice sandwich, salad and apple lunch (with zesty italian dressing!). One sandwich had tomatoes and the other did not, so he asked if I liked tomatoes - which I absolutely do. He gave me that one and said that if I didn' he would have taken that one and picked them off. I had discovered on the way to the picnic site that he loves onions, so I thought I would check my sandwich for onions - which I found. As I took them out, he plucked them out of my hand as I struggled to figure out where to put them that wasn't going to be in the way of my salad. Sign of a good date #1: You become fast friends enough to unabashedly pick through the other's food. How convenient.

I told him, "except for the onions, are a pretty good sandwich maker!" He thanked me and shortly thereafter replied, "except for the onions, you are a pretty good sandwich eater!" I couldn't fault him there. That comment gave rise to a discussion about how each eats their sandwiches, which is one of those conversations that may be best kept for later. Not because it's personal or anything, but it's really uncomfortable to tell a person the manner in which you hold and eat your sandwiches and get an odd silence and the, "you have a certain way you eat sandwiches?!?" look. Awkward!

Notwithstanding the potential with the direction this conversation went, this did not become awkward for us. I learned that we agree on getting the peanut butter and jam to the edge of the sandwich and that while I must have pickle in every bite (if I have pickle on my sandwich at all - but not on the PBJ, silly!), he says I'd never find a dill pickle in his refridgerator, but he likes sweet pickles. That was a serious blow! I'm a Christian woman, though, so I told him I wouldn't hold it against him and that everyone is entitled to their own opinion. He retorted that it wasn't opinion, he was just right. I bit my tongue. ;)

So, if I were to tell you how to measure a good date, I would have to say - from experience - that if you find you disagree about several things (e.g. Eating a sandwich 'corner-corner-middle from the bottom up' vs. 'Start at the top and eat in a spiral until you come to the middle' or 'Dill pickles in every bite' vs. 'Only sweet pickles in my fridge' or Tomatoes vs. Onions or Loves the rain vs. Doesn't like to get wet or Can't bring yourself to text message vs. Really likes to text) but you both actually pay attention to similar kinds of details in your respective lives, it's not the end of the world. And it was a very entertaining date, which is important.

All that said, it would be nice if he loved dill pickles as much as you do. . . . I'm just saying!